(Originally published May 19, 1982)
Language is the means by which we communicate with each other and I don't know another language other than English, where one word can have so many connotations.
Take the word SINGLE - more often than not, it is associated with multiple persons, places or things .... It is sort of like being alone in a crowd....
This being "alone in a crowd" starts early on in life. Our first taste of this happens in the nursery of the maternity ward when we are surrounded by other screaming, squirming single entities (except in the case of Siamese twins) and on to kindergarten where we are lined up SINGLE file for fire drill time.
There are SINGLE family dwellings that sometimes house a multitude of people and when renting a SINGLE motel room, you almost always end up with two double beds. Speaking of beds, you know twin beds are just a pair of singles.....
SINGLES CLUBS and SINGLES BARS are so crowded you couldn't be alone if you wanted to, and if you wanted to be alone, you sure wouldn't be at gatherings of SINGLES.
In sports, a SINGLE in a ball game is really a team effort to score and a SINGLES tennis match is played by two people.
Music has even pitched a tune for the SINGLE, like "I wish I were SINGLE again", which tells us the party of the first part is sort of sorry they joined with the party of the second part. Barbara Mandrell's rendition of "Sleeping SINGLE in a Double Bed" could be taken for an invitation...
I know lots of SINGLE parents with multiple offspring, whose offspring are noted for the quote "There isn't a SINGLE good thing to eat in the refrigerator" and speaking of eating, the food industry has even capitalized by producing SINGLE servings. As my luck runs, I open can of "soup for one" and immediately hoards of people materialize - forcing me to open all the remaining SINGLE serving foods I have in stock.
Well, by now I am sure I have thoroughly confused you, but you know, there isn't a SINGLE thing I can do about it.
-GRANNY
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Saturday, May 12, 2012
Dieting
(Originally published May 12, 1982)
With summer fast approaching, the great concern and/or obsession in this country seems to be the pound. I'm not speaking of the British pound sterling, but ... the extra pound or two that hangs over a chair when seated, or the pounds that won't allow last year's bathing suit to be worn with out threats of obscenity.
The second largest past time in this country isn't TV as one would imagine, (the first being eating), not at all, it is dieting. Everyone who is ANYONE at all, is on a diet (If you don't believe me, just ask 'em).
During the great depression of the 30's there is no mention of dieting, that I could find in the textbooks. Nearly everyone in the country was as lean as the times. The big objective then was just to keep body and soul together.
Prosperity not only brings more FOOD to the LARDER, but. ... more LARD to the FOODER, and more sheckels in the pockets of what I call the "fat merchants". Now, "fat merchants" sell illusions -"buy my merchandise" get "slim and trim" and life will be "HAPPY EVER AFTER." (I know some skinny people who are miserable).
In some cultures fat is the "in" thing. For example, in old China the more blubberous the wife, the more prosperous the husband. (This rule must have been made by men), but there were drawbacks from the wife's point of view. The husband would parade his portly wife before the townspeople to declare how rich he was and then "split" to where he had a couple of "slim and trim" concubines stashed.
And take the Potentates of India -not once will you find one of them ordering a "salad" from the menu of the local oasis. Their weight was their fortune, and literally so. Once a year their subjects paid tribute to them. The "big boys" were weighed and in return were given a pound of gold for each pound of "fat." Now that's one time when gluttony paid off. All through history "fat" was equated with wealth and happiness. Look at Buddah - that fat little dickens has lasted for several thousand years. The great artists of history seemed to prefer painting ladies of the larger variety.
Well, back to the subject of fat-food and fads. There are thousands of aids to help us get thin - pills, diets by the gross, exercise gyms, special scales to weigh food, weight watchers, overeaters anonymous, hypnosis, counters, imitation foods, sugar free, fat free, and they all cost a FORTUNE.
It just doesn't make sense to spend all that money for FOOD to get thin when the answer is so simple - just fill your plate with every thing that you crave and enjoy - chew each bite 20 times -- but don't swallow. It works every time!
Well, must run - time for the Richard Simmons Show, then have to at the health food store on the way to aerobic dance class.
-GRANNY
With summer fast approaching, the great concern and/or obsession in this country seems to be the pound. I'm not speaking of the British pound sterling, but ... the extra pound or two that hangs over a chair when seated, or the pounds that won't allow last year's bathing suit to be worn with out threats of obscenity.
The second largest past time in this country isn't TV as one would imagine, (the first being eating), not at all, it is dieting. Everyone who is ANYONE at all, is on a diet (If you don't believe me, just ask 'em).
During the great depression of the 30's there is no mention of dieting, that I could find in the textbooks. Nearly everyone in the country was as lean as the times. The big objective then was just to keep body and soul together.
Prosperity not only brings more FOOD to the LARDER, but. ... more LARD to the FOODER, and more sheckels in the pockets of what I call the "fat merchants". Now, "fat merchants" sell illusions -"buy my merchandise" get "slim and trim" and life will be "HAPPY EVER AFTER." (I know some skinny people who are miserable).
In some cultures fat is the "in" thing. For example, in old China the more blubberous the wife, the more prosperous the husband. (This rule must have been made by men), but there were drawbacks from the wife's point of view. The husband would parade his portly wife before the townspeople to declare how rich he was and then "split" to where he had a couple of "slim and trim" concubines stashed.
And take the Potentates of India -not once will you find one of them ordering a "salad" from the menu of the local oasis. Their weight was their fortune, and literally so. Once a year their subjects paid tribute to them. The "big boys" were weighed and in return were given a pound of gold for each pound of "fat." Now that's one time when gluttony paid off. All through history "fat" was equated with wealth and happiness. Look at Buddah - that fat little dickens has lasted for several thousand years. The great artists of history seemed to prefer painting ladies of the larger variety.
Well, back to the subject of fat-food and fads. There are thousands of aids to help us get thin - pills, diets by the gross, exercise gyms, special scales to weigh food, weight watchers, overeaters anonymous, hypnosis, counters, imitation foods, sugar free, fat free, and they all cost a FORTUNE.
It just doesn't make sense to spend all that money for FOOD to get thin when the answer is so simple - just fill your plate with every thing that you crave and enjoy - chew each bite 20 times -- but don't swallow. It works every time!
Well, must run - time for the Richard Simmons Show, then have to at the health food store on the way to aerobic dance class.
-GRANNY
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