Daylight Savings

(Originally published April 21, 1982)

Well, the government is right on time again. Just when you are licking your wounds and about to recover from the last assault "Income Tax", they "zap" us with good 'ole "Daylight Savings Time". For over 15 years we have gone along with "their little joke" and I am about to rebel.

I am familiar with all kinds of "savings" -"savings accounts" -"savings bonds" -"saving souls", "saving yourself' until you are married" and during, the big one (WWII) I was the champion "saver" of aluminum foil from cigarette packages, but I sure wish some government official would explain to me, how in the heck can you save an hour of sunlight? I have tried by "locking it in a vault," "catching a few rays in a brown paper bag," "pulling the shades when I find a whole room of the glitter," but it always disappears when the sun goes down.

Now, maybe this isn't much to get 'riled' over, but doesn't the government know how much trouble this causes the masses?

I wonder how many people are still trying to re-set their sun dials or program a stomach not to get hungry for another hour. It's no wonder the weary mothers of America are about to march on Washington - just when your get kids in the habit of going to sleep at 8:00 PM, when it is nice and dark, we are given another hour of sunshine.

Another thing that bothers me is what kind of 'dividends' the government plans to pay us on the 'savings'. To be fair, how about 15 minutes a week, compounded semi-annually. Let's see, that comes to approximately ... Oh, never mind, they would goof that up too. They would have to rewrite the calendar and some "big wheels" would probably have Saturday coming on Monday - let's leave well enough alone.

And doesn't the government know I am a busy lady (trying to get enough together to pay income taxes again next year). I really don't have time to dash outside each morning, run from tree to tree like the "town crier" calling "wake up and chirp little birdies - you think it is 4:00 AM, but Capitol Hill says
5:00 AM."

Well cheer up, we only have six more months of this. Americans are known for our strength, we can make it, one day at a time.

-GRANNY